How Close Is Too Close?

Brandon and I do a lot of things together. As far as couples go, we’re pretty tight; he is easily my best friend, and I his. So when we are going places or doing things, we want to include the other, even if it is an event where someone would not normally bring his/her girlfriend/boyfriend. When the guys were all going to shoot guns a few months ago, I was practically begged to tag along, despite my complete lack of knowledge pertaining to guns.

As exhibited by the way I’m holding this AR15
That look of pride in his eyes as he watches you load
your first cartridge

Brandon, who knows nothing about weddings and had never been to one personally – and in general is afraid of and confused by the huge event that is most weddings – has been to two family weddings with me. In the same summer. Where he had to dress up. Both times. Which he hates.

Brandon looking uncomfortable at my sister’s wedding.

More comfortable at my cousin’s wedding.

And a few weeks ago when a friend was celebrating her birthday by having an ugly sweater party, guess who jumped on board?
That would be us.

But how close is too close? Being the kind of couple that enjoys spending time together is a good thing almost always, but sometimes it gets into shadier territory. At the end of last semester, as I was trying to decide what I should do for my Capstone project (a project that sums up your college career, essentially), I was offered a great opportunity. The game majors at our school have a year-long Capstone project called Senior Team, and their job is to produce a fully functioning game by the end of the year. Brandon is a Game Art and Animation major, and luckily his team was one of five out of the original nine teams chosen to move forward into second semester. I had been toying with the idea of asking to join one of the teams in the role of Producer for my Capstone, thinking that it would be good management experience before I got out into the real world. Brandon and I discussed it and both agreed, it would be a good idea – but not for his team. A few weeks later I got a call from a Game Designer friend, asking if I would be Producer for his game. Which is also Brandon’s game. Meaning I would be his boss.

Clearly this is a decision that was fraught with danger. What if we disagreed about how best to handle a problem? What if I had to ask him to do something he didn’t want to? What if we ended up hating each other? What if we broke up and died and the whole world exploded in a fiery ball of passion and despair? After a (very) long discussion, Brandon and I decided we could do it, and I accepted the Producer position. So far, it has been one of the hardest and most rewarding things I have ever done. 

Making the decision of where to draw the line between being involved in each others’ lives and being TOO involved is not always easy, and it’s always important to have your own space. But if you have great communication and feel that you can be professional with each other even when tough things come up (like when he tells you that a major art asset is going to take six of the nine remaining weeks to complete, which it cannot), then you may just be in for one of the coolest working experiences you’ll ever have – with your best friend.

Where do you draw the line of “too close” with your significant other?



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2 responses to “How Close Is Too Close?

  1. It's tough. Seems to me too close is when you stop appreciating each other. Also, I love the new header!

  2. Thanks, Rachel! And I agree, continuing to appreciate the other person is paramount. I also think having fun is important. If you're no longer having fun, but instead find yourselves sitting in the same room night after night and not saying too much…. something should probably change.

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